Why The Universe Keeps Giving You What You DON’T Want

Sometimes the universe delivers EXACTLY what we ask for, in a way that feels like exactly what we don’t want.

This can make it very difficult to see and feel that you’re being supported. I promise, you’re ALWAYS being supported. When it feels like things aren’t going your way, you have to stop and be honest about where you’re blocking the flow. Oftentimes, these blocks come from the fact that we don’t realize we’re being given exactly what we asked for… exactly the way we need it. The universe (or god, goddess… whatever suits you) isn’t a magic genie where your wish is it’s command. It will 100% support you in creating a life you love by giving you the challenges, experiences, tools, skills and relationships you NEED in order to get to where you want to go. Sure, it would feel better if you just got the awesome job, right? If prince charming just showed up at your door already?

Probably… but think about this:

You might not be the person you need to be in order to really thrive in that job, relationship or experience without going through something else FIRST.


If you’re crystal clear about what you want and taking constant action towards making it happen, but the universe consistently presents you with something you’re resisting, it’s time to lean into it and uncover what it is you need to learn, gain, experience or work through. Sometimes the things you’re resisting are a necessary part of the journey and you’re not going to get there if you continue to push back. Sometimes opportunities and connections we need aren’t where we think we’re going to find them. Sometimes we need to be in challenging relationships or jobs to get clearer on what we do want, learn about ourselves and grow in ways we never would otherwise.

1) Look for the lesson or the gift.

If you’re being presented with a challenge or something other than what you wanted, learn to look for the lesson or the gift. What can be learned or gained from the situation or relationship? Where do you need to grow? How can you be of better service, show up more fully, or learn to be more compassionate? What tools are you gaining? There is ALWAYS a lesson and gift in every situation. Find it.

2) Stop resisting and start moving with the flow.

Releasing your resistance doesn’t mean that you can’t continue going after what you want, it means that you’re allowing life to unfold as it should. It also means learning how to show up to each and every moment fully present. Doing and being the best that you can in every situation, regardless of whether it’s a easy or challenging. How you do anything is how you do everything, so learn to show up full and give your all to every person and situation you find yourself in.

3) Stay positive.

Mindset is everything my friend, you have to stay positive. Yes, feel what you’re feeling and if you need to fall apart or get upset, that’s completely okay. Process whatever you’re feeling, but don’t let it consume your spirit and drag you down.

I’d love to hear from you!

Have you ever experienced this in your life? What was the situation and what did you end up learning or gaining that helped you get to exactly where you wanted to be? Maybe you’re experiencing this right now… if so, leave a comment below sharing where you’re at and what’s showing up in your life that you’re resisting.

This entry was posted in Find Your Why, Passion

10 Responses to Why The Universe Keeps Giving You What You DON’T Want

  1. Elizabeth says:

    Well boy this hit the nail on the head. Recently I have been praying for the right guy to come into my life. So I threw the question to the Universe. BAMB! this guy showed up with two hours. We started speaking and he asked if I had anyone, I indicate I did to brush him. But when I returned home I placed a question to the Lord, something to the effect I this is the guy give me a sign I did this on two consecutive occasions and it unfolded how I ask. But hear this I got the guy’s number of his work place. So I called him, he invited me to come see him at his work place (that is where we first meet). When I did reached we talked a bit. So I asked him question like if he is married or seeing someone because if that was the case I will leave well enough alone. He told me he is married but separated or another thing he ALWAYS have on this shades so I asked him to remove it so I can see his face properly but he said he has a heart condition and he will not like to at this time because how I may react (that did sit well with me) and also he has net like socking on his head. So my question is how can God give me these signs and this guy appears to be SHADY!!! Please help to understand this.


  2. Janet says:

    I often wonder why my now ex, came into my life for 6 months..3 were great, then he changes. All those promises to be everything that he wasn’t after the first 3 months.
    It sucks when someone presents himself as a certain way and then can’t follow through.
    I’m still trying to figure out exactly why he came into my life.
    Why did I have to Be involved in his situation that he’s trying to deal with?
    why did i have to get hurt for it? I’m not sure what I learned except it probably just reinforced that relationships don’t seem to ever work out. And now with painful matter who breaks up with who.

  3. Mimi says:

    I have asked God to help me reach my goal of graduate school in 2013. I now found out I got accepted to an ivy league school with a $30,000 fellowship. I was so happy, until I was told in order to accept this opportunity I had to quit my job. God gave me exactly what I asked for with an amazing twist. Not only that, but still will have to take out loans and know that I won’t be making any income for about 2 years. Now, I am at a point of having to make a decision. 1. If accepted, go to a more affordable school and keep my job. 2. Quit my job and take this opportunity, risking not having a job and incurring much debt on high interest rate school loans 3. Keep my job, say no to the fellowship and find a way to pay, most likely it being expensive school loans. I am scared to make the wrong decision, and never thought that by getting EXACTLY all I asked for I would be in a situation of much anxiety and indecisiveness. What if I make the wrong decision? Is there a right or wrong decision? I just hope God helps me and gives me a sign or SOMETHING to lead me down the best path!

  4. f varga says:

    i am 49 year old man that has believed in the universe taking care of me for 25 years. and when i first found out about these most amazing power my life changed for the bests. but for what ever reason i keep falling out and having large setbacks in life. not sure what i am doing to lose the vision.

  5. Maryam says:

    I have been asking why things were going badly when I had made a big, positive order with the Universe. BIG HUGE GOALS. At one point things actually seemed to get worse, but the more love I have put into the negative, the more the negative transforms. And finally my question as to why things were going in the opposite direction have been answered with this great article. So, thank you. I have seen it before where people have said that the Universe gives us the experiences we need for the evolution of our consciousness, but until I saw this article it was never entirely clear. You have answered a question that is nearly 3-4 years old and I have been asking almost daily.

  6. Paula says:

    Steps 2 and 3 are very tough for me. Particularly 3
    When the fear comes, when anything goes “wrong” my mind creates this horror stories of destitution and starvation. I am stopping , breathing and saying. That is not true, The universe supports me.
    I am saying it, and willing to fully embrace it.
    Any tips to help that process?

  7. Paul says:

    There isn’t anything to resist. That’s the point, There’s only one of us here.
    Perceive it from the standpoint of a game, for that is exactly what the one is doing. The nothing knows it’s everything and plays the game so it can remember who it is and to feel Love.
    You cannot resist something that’s not there and never has been,.
    The only being there is, is Love, it’s all that’s here and ever will be here,
    Just Love. Be aware of this and perceive it and know that’s what you are and will ever be.

  8. Renee says:

    I continue to ask the universe and God for my marriage to be restored. We had some good times but then things started going down hill. We kept missing each other on the path to communicating. We were saying the same things but in different ways but we weren’t really listening to one another. My spouse suggested separating and getting counseling to deal with our own issues. My spouse also suggested that during that time we date each other, really take our time and get to know one another and then put our marriage back together. The whole time I was being blamed for the issues we were having. My spouse refused to take any responsibility for our problems. It was said that I was the one who messed it up. During the separation my spouse allowed some other person into our marital circle. Now my spouse has this person living with her, while we are still married and won’t talk to me, or check up on me to see if I’m ok. I keep praying that the third party trespasser is removed from our marital circle and that restoration, healing, and reconciliation take place. The universe hasn’t given answered my prayers. This is truly the desire of my heart and I just don’t understand why the universe would allow a relationship between the two of them to flourish, not being built on the right foundation. I can’t understand why the universe would allow me to be moved from my marriage and replaced with someone else. I keep wondering if I am doing something to block my blessing or desire to put my marriage back together. Is the universe working and I just don’t see it?

    • Tania says:

      I understand how hard it is for us to accept truth that we do not want to see. I would think about a couple of things that may help you determine some sort of purpose in this difficult situation:

      Is this relationship one that is inhibiting you from personally growing?

      Would you be truly happy for your spouse if your spouse was truly happy with the other person?

      Are there things that you have put off in your life as a sacrifice due to this relationship? Would these things make you happier, more fulfilled?

      What exactly is hurting you the most, the separation or the fact that he now is with someone new?

      Do you feel that you are intefering with the universe’s natural flow in your life by not staying still in your actions?

      What does your higher self tell you? This voice may not always say what we want to hear but is the best source of truth for us.

      Sometimes us asking ourself these type of questions allow us to see what the underlying factors really are and will help you put things into perspective.

      Hope this helps!

      Namaste :)

  9. Tania says:

    I have asked the universe for a healthy relationship with my 5 year old daughter as our relationship has been going down hill since she started living with her father over a year ago. It seems like every attempt that my maternal instict has pushed me to do has been unsuccessful, every time becoming more evident that there is a wall blocking any means of restoring my relationship with my only daughter. I have found it most difficult to process such thought as her life being better without me in it and have questioned why must it be so extreme to where we have no communication. I have found it hard to believe that the universe would allow someone who has such negative and ill feelings towards me have victory over achieving my child to feel discouraged from recognizing me as a loving mother who just wants her child to be happy and loved.

    I have now come to terms with the universe, although I donot understand everything about this situation. If it wasn’t for this torment in my life, I would have never gained intimacy with myself through the universe nor would I know what unconditional love is.

    I have learned that the flow of the universe is fundamental in ensuring that our most positive frequency is achieved. I am one to be impulsive when I feel that there is injustice in a given situation but now have learned faith.

    I now focus on my purpose and what I represent and no longer blame others for this seperation. I now send her love every time I feel sad or angry instead of lashing out and radiating negative energy.

    I am now aware of what my actions, thoughts, and intentions create and reflect more on these things. I want to be the best person for when the time comes that I will have reached my best state and for her to feel that about me.

    I still have the pain in my heart that this void has left me with, but now understand what to do with it and how to turn these negative feelings into positive ones which I can send her way.

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Not only did Stephenie help pinpoint my passions, but she also helped me get started on creating my business. I now know what my passions and purpose are in life and am excited to continue on this path. I have the clarity I so desired before I started this journey. I feel free because I have a deeper sense of self and purpose. — Adlin Cedeno